collin is through his surgery. and he is through it well. as for us, we start seeing very new and peculiar stuff in the intensive care unit: marvelling glances - at our fighters. these experienced people, nurses, doctors, experts of their fields! who certainly have been through many a situation like this...

still, the feeling remains. a feeling of imbalance: we take more than we give, way more. but we will think of something to make it up one day, promise!

for the meantime: thank you all! nurses, doctors, midwives, finger crossers, blood donators, guardian angels and support personnel! for sensitivity, calm hands, words, jokes, pets on our backs, open ears, knowledge, thoughts, miracles... and thank you to one special person for one special call after hours!

i will never forget all this!

three snoopy dwarves with always another question meet a friendly giant with always another answer...

these or similar words could as well summarize a fairytale. or a blockbuster. ...or life.

all these three have much in common: they just are, we need not justify them. and we don't know the ending. at least not the first time round.

maybe it IS a fairytale, maybe a movie. busts my block, any day!! but maybe... juuuust maybe, what if it is life? maybe there is more than can be seen. maybe the curtain did move briefly. doctor noeh did say, vicky had a guardian angel! and collin gave me - again - a sign: thumb and index finger bent, the rest of them straight! the giant. "promoted" at last, as he always so desired. and he does precisely what any grampa would: he watches over them! and i need not justify this.

here is to three snoopy dwarves with always another question.
and a friendly giant with always another answer...

well, for it is - ever since moses returned from mount sinai - a proven concept, first the good news... victoria's alert level can with ordainment and authorization be lowered to green. the little mouse has still a huge bandage on her arm, but otherwise gets great fun out of her life, even leading the weight gaining contest, at the moment. she smiles, glances, grabs fingers and hypnotizes her kangaroo until it snores...
bottom line: alert is on green

benjamin is flying under radar so far, even if re-intubated. needs a little R&R. and everybody keeps hoping that he won't hatch something new. but at present there are no such indications.
therefore: alert level in on greenish-yellow

collin. well, first off, collin is a fighter just like his sister. from two different, very experienced doctors independently there was a lot of information today, in what different directions it may go from here and what according means and measures can be taken accordingly. of course, among them are some more comfortable and others more risky. BUT: the infection is withdrawing, says the blood test. the decision - surgery yes or no - will be made within 48 hours.
so, alltogether still a red alert, but as any cloud, it, too, has a silver lining.

therefore: please, please, keep crossing them fingers, gather spiritual energy, bundle it and send it their way, everybody. you make 5 people very very happy!

lyrical (sizilian):
path cut in the doorway,
explanation, words, severity.
a different stage, a well-known play,
still faith in skills, ability...
to catch you is beyond estray,
with hands, hope or serenity.
if ever we profoundly may,
we will, we are your family!

medical:
collin has caught an infection, now. the good news is that he is coping a bit better than his sister a week ago.

optimistical:
also our little big one will take this hurdle, with our and your support!

was that better an attempt to talk about critical stuff in a less scary way?

our little mouse was at the kangaroo again! she could possible need some surgery on her arm, but victory is victoria! she made it! and we burst with joy!

ha, time for a new poll.
who will have gained the most weight by the end of the month, relative to birth weight?

	benjamin
	collin
	victoria
Ergebnis anzeigen Erstellt von mickmick am 2011.03.16, 00:05.

and the nurses are not allowed to cheat! :)

three words describing today: almost everything peachy...

our boys smile.
benjamin has managed to breath without any assistance for 5 minutes.
collin will be re-extubated soon, because the little man fights the machine's air stream.
vicky looks rosy-healthy, stabilises her values increasingly and thus gives reason for real realistic hopes.
even nurses and doctors make happier faces, a joke or another flies through the room, mood lightens up...

this is how kangarooing is meant to be, we wear our kangaroo ears proudly up again...

this is also because of you, i didnt forget!

interesting conversation i had today. physician - engineer. insider - outsider. professional - layman. healer - father. only academics we are both... and men, of course! :)

and i learned a completely new aspect of the whole blog thing... which is: doctors can read important information from written personal thoughts of parents, and thus further and better learn how to deal with edgy situations like premature birth.

i never thought of it THIS way. but FINALLY there is something more for us to give back than just saying "thank you" - even if it is just something small...

in this spirit: a cordial welcome to physicians of all fields, especially neonatologists. and if anything should ever need discussing, i am always just one click away...

the nurses take the full range of it, by now: up and down... when one is quiet another will be sure to sound his or her alarm. we're in for something, i can tell! :) but, we wanted it this way. and hey, guess what? we still like it this way and will continue to like it this way all the way into the future... :)

another attempt on a status, in a little more technical terms:
benjamin at the moment is the one most stable. today he even breathed without any assistance whatsoever... ordinary breathing air, like you and me. and OF COURSE he did so, while i couldnt run and see as i had collin on my wide chest... *sigh* they do that to me on purpose! :)

collin has - unfortunately - re-opened his ductus venosa... what a drag! but i got an explanation as to how this actually works, closing a blood vessel by means of medication. being the engineer, i am always interested in the design perspective & approach to problem solving. and IF nature is operating with the insultingly huge bandwidth she's using, at least i wanna get the how-to... take heed, though, this is a layman's explanation in layman's terms, so dont nail me to it! here it goes: blood vessels in themselves only stay open as long as their receptors are provided with certain messenger substances in the blood.. so, basically, separating the receptors from the messeger substances does the trick. and the ductus venosa has exorbitantly many of these receptors, which means that the effect the separation medication inevitably has on the other blood vessels is respectively weaker and thus can be sorted into the "side effects" category... OK, thinks the engineer, nature also just puts her pants on one leg at a time! and being a cunning medic, one can make use of just this! which makes me repeat my statement from chapter 36: thank you for every minute of each lesson in your studies!
so, collin is at the moment on his last attemt to close his ductus by means of medication. crossed fingers, please!

victoria... well, i dont really know where to start. but there really are many good news. all the more surprising that all this is not enough for cancelling the alert, but rather "only" change it from ORANGE to YELLOW... but it is a step down the right path. the sum of several "ones" is always greater than one, while the sum of many "zeros" remains nil.
and: she does react to our voices very clearly. even if we are not yet allowed to kangaroo her again, yet, she turns her head our way, opens her eyes and smiles!
in essence: what a fighter at that age!

all finger crossers continued thanks!

wow, what a scolding storm i unleashed there... because my wording and pictures struck fright into readers' spines...

sorry, but believe me, this is no evil intention! it's the "emotius" inside me.

when i feel bad and unstable, i act PURELY on instinct, anyways. the poem was my very own personal processing of a real difficult day, full of real difficult events, which really noone needs. the middle of the night was the only time i could do such thing - after all, in the day one has certain responsibilities - even emotionally... at this point - and who will hold it against me? - i looked not even as far as my own nose.

well, same goes for the opposite direction: with the moment of good news emerging, up wakes my highly optimistic, sunny joker's temper, eating away the boredom of regularity. i am a quality engineer, i believe firmly in "quality is the customer returning, not the product!" and in a certain way, you are my customers... non-commercial consumers...

in a nutshell, a well-disposed reader could take away as a summary this: to an extent i let you peek into our cards. with everything that is part of it. i dont think up the events, thats the older, wiser guy with the longer beard. i'm just the chronicler. this said: please, dont shoot the messenger! thanx! :)